Your unhinged guide to growth

Introducing the next evolution of this newsletter?

and

Apr 01, 2024

Today I have a bittersweet announcement to share.

After three years of serious writing, I have decided to pivot to a new direction: satire.

I regret to inform you that Growth Unhinged will now consist of memes, gifs, puns, dad jokes and rizz (did I use that correctly?).

And it’s getting rebranded to Simply Unhinged. Don’t blame me, blame the algorithm.

In that spirit, in this edition I’ll unpack the most unhinged growth ideas of the past year. These are perhaps the opposite of quick wins: low success rate, significant risk, unclear outcomes. But they’re certainly not boring. Helping me out is Jonathan Anderson, co-founder and CEO of Candu.

PS, happy April Fools’ Day (aka my 36th birthday 😉).

1. Sell your product to an untapped market (#interns)

Suggested by

CJ Gustafson

of Mostly Metrics

We keep hearing that SaaS is more competitive than ever and that it’s nearly impossible to get the attention of buyers.

Well, there’s one segment of prospects that has remained mostly untapped: college interns. Pair college interns with uncapped usage-based pricing and you may just be sitting on a goldmine…

Last summer Pinecone’s CEO told The Information that he heard about an intern who accidentally racked up a $500,000 compute bill with the company. It turns out that the intern “forgot to stop some AI model testing”.

#Relatable. I mean, who hasn’t been guilty of leaving the faucet running from time to time?! (I’ve written about the upsides of usage-based pricing before, but I never thought to include this side benefit 😂)

How to make it more unhinged?! You could get inspired by subscription cancellation flows and make it nearly impossible for someone to cancel their usage. You’d like to turn off the meter? I’m sorry, you’ll first have to answer five questions, call our hotline and then send an official cancellation request via the postal service.

2. Go ALL in on product-led growth

There are times when a pop-up notification is appropriate, such as when we’re having an outage or your credit card is declined.

Then, there’s this case study from a notable project management tool:

“Check out our conference.”
“Check out this feature!”
“Did you already hear about our conference!?”

It’s a bit like we downloaded a virus on the family computer. Or, it’s the customer marketing team who cried wolf.

How to make it more unhinged?! It’s easy: we could add even more pop-ups. It could be like when we finally win solitaire. Why settle for three at a time when you could have hundreds?

3. Have some fun with your numbers

Sam Bankman-Fried was sentenced to 25 years in prison on Thursday. But what got him here? And is this the worst spreadsheet of all time?

Who doesn’t love a disclaimer on a spreadsheet?

The spreadsheet, which somewhat resembles a balance sheet, shows the giant financial hole FTX created right before bankruptcy. There are some absolutely winning features, including “$2.2bn” of Serum token (nearly worthless), the obtuse illiquid asset of ‘TRUMPLOSE” and Jonathan’s personal favorite, an admonition: “There were many things I wish I could do differently than I did…the poorly labeled internal bank-related account, and the size of customer withdraws during a run on the bank.”

How to make it more unhinged?! As spreadsheets go, this is already pretty wild. I suppose there could be other tabs with non-financial crimes listed.

4. Take a page from The Real Housewives

Social media is all about going viral, right? The Real Housewives popularized the viral fight – and there have been some GOOD ones (like the fight that inspired the cat meme shared ‘round the world).

Big tech tried this growth experiment in 2023 with the taunting of a cage match between Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg. Only in this duel, Zuck was promoting the recent launch of Twitter-rival #Threads rather than his latest reality TV drama.

Maybe it worked? #Threads is apparently back from the dead with a reported 130 million monthly users in Q4, up from 30 million in Q3.

How to make it more unhinged?! Maybe we’ll see Sam Altman battle artificial general intelligence (AGI) in a debate live tweeted by ChatGPT?

5. Befriend ChatGPT to make you $$$

Suggested by

Tom Orbach

of Marketing Ideas

We usually talk about using AI as a copilot to improve efficiency or automate manual work. What if instead you could corrupt AI to make you $$$ without any work? 🤔

I bring you perhaps my favorite prank of the last year where a hacker reportedly convinced a Chevy Dealership to “sell” them a new car for only $1. (Needless to say, that chatbot was quickly deactivated by the dealership.)

How to make it more unhinged?! Why not turn your website chatbot into an auctioneer who bids up the price on an unsuspecting prospect (please don’t)?

6. Why do PLG when you could launch a fake free trial instead? (#catfishing)

Anyone who’s entering the dating pool risks being catfished. But we’ve come to expect more from our SaaS products. Still, every once in a while, we come across the dreaded “fake” free trial.

It looks like a free trial. The button says you’re opting into a free trial. And then, “bam,” you’ll need to talk to a sales rep so they can help set up your account. Sure, sure…

Listen. We get it. Your sales team needs prospects to book a demo, but your prospects want to explore your product without having to talk to a sales rep. Win-win?

How to make it more unhinged?! You hire George Santos to revitalize your startup. Oh, wait a minute…

7. Bring in George Santos to revitalize your startup

Cameo, the startup offering personalized videos featuring your favorite stars, became a unicorn in 2021 following dramatic growth. They reported $100 million in revenue and 300% year-on-year growth at the time. The business has since run into hard times with several rounds of layoffs, trimming the team from nearly 400 down to roughly 50 according to TechCrunch.

Cameo became a viral hit again from the unlikeliest source, former congressman George Santos. Santos has reportedly made 1,200+ videos (!?!) on the platform and has raked in nearly $400,000 in earnings. Truly #iconic.

Santos also (literally) brought Ziwe back to life, which had a revival on YouTube a few months ago. People are calling it the most important interview since Frost vs. Nixon.

How to make it more unhinged?! Consider hiring George Santos for your next pitch meeting. It’s bound to be a conversation starter.

I hope you enjoyed some comedic relief on this first day of Q2. Please don’t try any of these ideas at home. For more serious growth ideas, check out these resources:

A guest post by

Jonathan Anderson